Jesus joins AFA to gain early tickets to second coming

[heresy]

As you may have seen, Jesus appeared at the last global atheist convention.

Tonight, Sunday, he has secured the family laptop, as his dad is having the day off... (as you would expect, we use Unix, as Windows and Apple are seen to be rival gods, and the old man is really jealous)
So to avoid the forces of evil, Jesus has just sent his money off to the AFA to join, and hopefully secure a ticket to the convention and dinner. ( under another name though, as to avoid suspicion and tax )

The second coming of Jesus is planned for the global atheist convention. He will be all too happy to pose for photo opportunities. He is really looking forward to catching up with the devil again, and will return to conversing in the first person. ( the whole trinity thing gets confusing ).

Jesus makes the point of not being on the official guest list. For obvious reasons.
Therefore be ye also ready: for in such an hour as ye think not the Son of man cometh - Matthew 24:44

peace and Condell to you all

[askegg]

This time we'll make sure you're well and truly dead. In the name of peace, of course.

[Praxis]

It's about time you put in an appearance!

This time I'll be sure to get a photo with Jebus. Looking forward to seeing the old bugger again :D

[Annie]

Hey Heresy! You got my ticket last time. You won't be getting them this time! :-) You sat next to my friend who visits here occasionally. I was supposed to be sitting next to her until the drama which stopped me from attending unfolded. She said you were a hoot! Looking forward to meeting you, your father and the holy ghost. You'd best run them by security though to avoid any embarrassing incident.

http://tapatalk.com/mu/7b628702-de0b-6731.jpg


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- King Pattalak

[heresy]

Very much looking forward to catching up with you Annie, and Praxis, askegg , and all the other forumites and associated heretics..

if any other mythical gods are in attendance this time around, group photo !

[davo]

looks like we have to crucify you again :mad:

[heresy]

if by crucify you mean, drink copious amounts of alcohol, engage in wild orgies that would shame a Roman Emperor, and feast of knowledge and wisdom of the speakers at the podium .. Then crucify away..

if you're talking hammer and nails... well there is just no escaping the woodwork... first it was a barn, then the full time job, then the other carpenter who couldn't spare the professional courtesy to botch the job on my cross.. It just never ends with you Pharisees..

[djarm67]

Unfortunately the devil will not be able to make the conference. He's far too busy administering a number of revenue generating ministry programs at Hillsong and won't be able to effectively manage a hand over to free up his time to attend.

He sends his apologies.

[heresy]

I bought a Hillsong book, it was a photo collection and also a montage of bible quotes, it was interesting that they used at least 5 versions of the bible to get the quotes that matched their particular world view..

Definitely on the 'to read' list is 'You need more money' by mr Houston.. I love his greed and gluttony.. A real inspiration for his 'flock' (to use the term condescendingly)

[Mickcee]

Cool ! will he sign my bible ! http://www.ebay.com/itm/THE-BIBLE-Autographed-JESUS-CHRIST-himself-RARE-/160642753290?pt=US_Fiction_Books&hash=item25670de30a

[Secme]

@Mickcee: I had the same thought, though I had forgotten about the ebay auction for the existing autographed version.

[heresy]

actually... funny story.... as the Messiah is not of this world, incidentally, his signature is also not something you may have been familiar with.. Currently there is legal action pending regarding the legality of his signature....

( funnier because it is true )

yes, bibles signed on request..

[eccles]

As you may have seen, Jesus appeared at the last global atheist convention.

Tonight, Sunday, he has secured the family laptop, as his dad is having the day off... (as you would expect, we use Unix, as Windows and Apple are seen to be rival gods, and the old man is really jealous)
So to avoid the forces of evil, Jesus has just sent his money off to the AFA to join, and hopefully secure a ticket to the convention and dinner. ( under another name though, as to avoid suspicion and tax )

The second coming of Jesus is planned for the global atheist convention. He will be all too happy to pose for photo opportunities. He is really looking forward to catching up with the devil again, and will return to conversing in the first person. ( the whole trinity thing gets confusing ).

Jesus makes the point of not being on the official guest list. For obvious reasons.


peace and Condell to you all

http://i871.photobucket.com/albums/ab275/eccles64/IMG_0489.jpg

[Allsun]

Yes, I was the chosen one who sat on the left side of Jesus at the last dinner ( Annie there was a reason you had to give up your ticket, mysterious ways and all that...)
Do you think they could put Jesus at a table for 12 (or is that 13) at the next dinner, all facing the same way of course.

[Secme]

@Allsun (http://www.atheistfoundation.org.au/forums/member.php?u=1334): I second this suggestion, it is a lot of effort for a laugh but so worth it.